click to leave fresh arse

Next week will be fine

Heh, would you have preferred he emerged a-la John full-kit-wanker Terry? 🤣🤷‍♂️

This, I was far too anxious that this wasn't going to happen. This is exactly what I wanted to see. And that penalty, the way Ian Wright used to smack 'em. Ooof!!!

Didn’t like his jeans, though. 🤷‍♂️😉

You are now the Chosen One 😇

Blogs, you’ve put the KO times back on. ❤️

It was quite something. He looked pleasantly overwhelmed by the reaction. No other player would have got that reaction, not even Isak (are you watching Tottenham?!!! Magic), so it shows how much it me...

Big Vik's cherry popper was especially satisfying because it's exactly what we bought him for. A runaway train barging his way into the box and blasting it home.... aah, that'll do, Vik, that'll do.

Eze’s swagger walking out onto the Emirates pitch with the #10 on his back. Oof. Watch out.

I tried telling everyone!

Please use your new found super power to make Liverpool take a hiding next weekend, thanks.

I tried telling everyone!

Arse! 5-0 Incoming!

Nice first arse!

Arse! 5-0 Incoming!

Because you see him constantly encouraging the other members of the team during matches - especially the younger ones - you rarely, if ever, see Martin doing that and now Martin may well be out for so...

Naw it’s a beautiful story and should serve as inspiration for many. Based on what Arteta said it sounds like Eze personally called him on Wednesday night and asked if a move was possible. The rest is...

Eze unveiling video is fantastic. Opposition fans would say it's overwrought and schmaltzy; whatever.

Use of Sampha's 'Indecision' to embellish the full circle narrative and black excellence vibe is ...

They showed it at half-time on the big screen. Twas most excellent.

Eze’s swagger walking out onto the Emirates pitch with the #10 on his back. Oof. Watch out.

Eze unveiling video is fantastic. Opposition fans would say it's overwrought and schmaltzy; whatever.

Use of Sampha's 'Indecision' to embellish the full circle narrative and black excellence vibe is ...

What a screamer from Pedri. 2-1.

Noticed the PL starting to have some 4K on the sideline but still a long way to go to match LaLiga production value.

Barca losing 2 0, Hansi Flick's jeans are so tight I think they're suppressing blood flow to his brain.

La Liga coverage is so good. I know some of you mentioned it last year, but I can really see it...

The way he went down was the way a professional goes down when there’s contact. I don’t think the contact was heavy, but neither do I think it was a dive. Like everything I’ve seen from this unbelieva...

I just don't want him to get in the habit of flicking his foot out at defenders. Don't give VAR an excuse to overturn it.

I just don't want him to get in the habit of flicking his foot out at defenders. Don't give VAR an excuse to overturn it.

Defender stomped Dowman's foot. Penalty all day long. VAR tried to overturn it but try as the did he was fouled. Theatric, yes. Painful, absolutely.

The way he went down was the way a professional goes down when there’s contact. I don’t think the contact was heavy, but neither do I think it was a dive. Like everything I’ve seen from this unbelieva...

He had a penalty in preseason that looked quite similar. That one was a legit penalty too but he did seem to go down a bit easy. I just hope he doesn't end up getting a reputation with referees.

He had a penalty in preseason that looked quite similar. That one was a legit penalty too but he did seem to go down a bit easy. I just hope he doesn't end up getting a reputation with referees.

I laughed as the Guardian asked whether Dowman was taking Drama at school as he went down after the tiniest of touches by Stach.

David Hytner actually at the stadium. . I watched the match on tv but I love the grauniad commentaries.

La Liga on Disney.

Was it Barry Glendenning?

He was in acres of space on the right shortly after he came on. I think it was Zubimendi who held on to the ball too long then passed left and Dowman threw his hands up in frustration. I think it’s in...

I laughed as the Guardian asked whether Dowman was taking Drama at school as he went down after the tiniest of touches by Stach.

Not many have seen but I loved how dowman always asked for the ball

2-3 weeks usually if it is torn, but maybe a week if it's just tweaked? His face said "I've done it."

I’m thinking of Michael Owen. I really hope this isn’t Saka’s fate. Would be tragic.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/45313122

Can anyone out there throw some light on a tight hammy. Can some ice and two week rest set it right.

The thought of Eze, Nwaneri and Madueke behind Gyökeres with Dowman to come on. How does Slot prepare for that.

Get well soon, Saka and Odegaard.

Dirty Leeds properly stomped

Night all

Get well soon, Saka and Odegaard.

Dirty Leeds properly stomped

Night all

Not to throw water on the optimism, but we definitely need Saka irrespective of who comes in as replacement.

The thing is he knows he has the defender in the pal of his hand 1v1. Unbelievable

Not to throw water on the optimism, but we definitely need Saka irrespective of who comes in as replacement.

Not to throw water on the optimism, but we definitely need Saka irrespective of who comes in as replacement.

Well that was fun!

Big Vik with a couple of goals to shut the doubters up.

Dowman was superb, didn't look out of place at all.

Didnt really look fluent, much more to come from this group, but it wa...

Well that was fun!

Big Vik with a couple of goals to shut the doubters up.

Dowman was superb, didn't look out of place at all.

Didnt really look fluent, much more to come from this group, but it wa...

Well that was fun!

Big Vik with a couple of goals to shut the doubters up.

Dowman was superb, didn't look out of place at all.

Didnt really look fluent, much more to come from this group, but it wa...

Well that was fun!

Big Vik with a couple of goals to shut the doubters up.

Dowman was superb, didn't look out of place at all.

Didnt really look fluent, much more to come from this group, but it wa...

Imagine being that good at football at 15 years old?

There are some automatisms that need to be developed in the final third. But the signs are good.

When Noni, Zubi, and Gyoky click, it will be fun.

Max is unstoppable one on one full stop

There are some automatisms that need to be developed in the final third. But the signs are good.

When Noni, Zubi, and Gyoky click, it will be fun.

First we nick a player from them then we nick top spot from them

Fantastic atmosphere at O’Hanlon’s if you’re ever in NYC.

I’m not sure we are out of second gear.

Max looks totally ready to me. He Ethan and MLS are such assets!

Why?

We've had this conversation... Ødegaard is captain. He was voted in by his peers.

My anxiety has been washed away. That was definitive. Shame I missed seeing his first goal. Watched the first half. By the time we got to the car he had scored. Seen the goal. Impressive and so him. A...

He’s scoring goals with the cannon on his chest… his name is Viktor…Viktpr Gyokeres

We that was fun. I think Declan Should take over the armband. We are top of the league.

We that was fun. I think Declan Should take over the armband. We are top of the league.

This iteration of The Arsenal is so likeable

Arteta and Berta. Credit to you both so far.

"question about whether reports our interest ramped up because of the injury to Kai"

No it wasn't a reaction to losing Kai, it was a preaction to losing Saka and Ode. 😏

Love the hair flicking from Gyokeres showing he read the criticism from last week 🤣

Happy

Fingers crossed for Saka and Ødegaard,but great having quality replacements.

Love the hair flicking from Gyokeres showing he read the criticism from last week 🤣

Happy

Love the hair flicking from Gyokeres showing he read the criticism from last week 🤣

Happy

He does when someone treads on his foot

And it's still holidays, poor sod.

Levy probably tried to talk it down to 0.5st.

I must admit, I thought VAR would overturn that pen decision.

Sunday

Just keep taking from them.

Back to school tomorrow for Dowman.

Max looks totally ready to me. He Ethan and MLS are such assets!

Not in a million years

He does when someone treads on his foot

👀

I must admit, I thought VAR would overturn that pen decision.

I must admit, I thought VAR would overturn that pen decision.

I might be alone in this but in the few times I've seen him max seems to go down a bit easily in the box.

I might be alone in this but in the few times I've seen him max seems to go down a bit easily in the box.

Hijacking 1st from Spurs. As if they have ownership of that lol.

Arse! 5-0 Incoming!

We are top of the league
Say
We are top of the league!

👀

👀

Arse! 5-0 Incoming!

👀

Night all

Dowman is undroppable now.

First name on the team sheet

Hit the ball into the net.

Gyok!!!!!!!
5-0
Fuck off dirty Leeds Cunts!

motd will be fun after a long time.

500!

Dowman is undroppable now.

First name on the team sheet

Was at the Beijing game on Wednesday night, won 7-0. At 90 mins ref just stopped the game, didn’t add a second of injury time lol. Hope we still have a few mins here to bang one more in!

Was at the Beijing game on Wednesday night, won 7-0. At 90 mins ref just stopped the game, didn’t add a second of injury time lol. Hope we still have a few mins here to bang one more in!

Was at the Beijing game on Wednesday night, won 7-0. At 90 mins ref just stopped the game, didn’t add a second of injury time lol. Hope we still have a few mins here to bang one more in!

Lol. Everyone passing the buck there. Just fucking shoot.

Leeds attacker just stopped mid-stride outside our box. They're absolute dogshit!

Heh. Nice one MG

'Gordon Gyoko'

Lol. Everyone passing the buck there. Just fucking shoot.

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

Heh, it really was Goofy-like.

'Gordon Gyoko'

Yes. But Greed is Good.

Getting closer. Would a fifth and sixth be being greedy?

Getting closer. Would a fifth and sixth be being greedy?

Lol. Quite a cartoonish shot of Havertz.

What’s gonna happen when Dowman leaves puberty? He’s leaving grown men for dead now with his control, pace and football brain and almost out-muscling them. It’s unreal!

Getting closer. Would a fifth and sixth be being greedy?

Nearly scored. What a belter from Max

Nearly scored. What a belter from Max

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

5 first team regulars missing. No radical drop off in quality. A proper squad.

Pretty girl sitting in 10th row.

Like a 7 iron up to the flag.

Dowman skies it

Nice goal for Gyokeres but Saka injured.

Lovely from Trossard

Lovely from Trossard

But some injuries I heard?

Dirty shit cunts

Starting to string some moves together. 4 goals helps. Dirty Leeds look shit.

Is good

Late to the match. How we doing?

Farke should not have that haircut.

Heh vacancy at West Ham soon

Nwaneri feeling like the old timer

Max Dowman. 15 years.

Put in your application. ;-P

Haha, I could be the manager… 😜

Madwookie is having a blinder down the right. Dowman incoming.

Who needs Saka or Odegaard?

Hopefully Madueke gets one

One more goal and then we're ahead of the Spuds on GD

Comfortable to send on Max now?

Comfortable to send on Max now?

Typical Arsenal. Two games and we've lost Odegaard, Saka and Havertz

Madueke now looks a prescient signing

Exactly the type of goal we dont score.

Saka banjaxed?

Gyok reminds me of Shearer...not the most skillful, but will do anything to get a shot off, big, strong and can kick it really fucking hard at the net

Saka banjaxed?

Noooo

Saka banjaxed?

Gary Neville is a spunk boozer

Exactly the type of goal we dont score.

Exactly the type of goal we dont score.

Swashbackling, 'no fucks given' incision into the box and bang. Not the cleanest finish but who on earth cares.

I'm in Prague.

Has Gyokeres scored yet?

Gyokeres #14

There you go

Well I am a bit calmer being 2-0 up after another sloppy first half performance. But for a superb, acrobatic reflex save from Raya it could be quite easily be a lot closer. Cala seems to like giving h...

Calafiori is just enjoyable to watch.

He does a bit. Not in the slightest bit worried, though. You?

Calm the nerves? AFC at home to a side just promoted, and under Farke likely to go down too. We haven't looked too clever no I'll give you that. No 14 needs to be told he is actually on the pitch FFS ...

Corner FC with another goal from a Rice delivery. The Gyok still looks a bit lost.

38 corners and 38 one-nils would do just fine, thank you very much.

Course mate. Jacky’s Bar 杰克斯酒吧 I think may have it. Beyond that not sure. When do you get there?

Sorry to ask this again (I should have bookmarked at the time) but you mentioned one or two places in Xi'an that showed PL games. Would you mind repeating?

Not even fair then. He was pretty well marked and right up on the keeper. The lesson, as always: Gary's a cunt.

Arse

Well in Nivekster.

Not exactly purring by any stretch, but 2-0 up at HT against dirty Leeds is not bad. Still look like we've been out on the piss the night before but that second goal from Sa...

Had the same thought just now. Just be so hard to simulate in training what these league games are actually like

Man of the match so far

Fullbacks scoring every time. LOL

38 corners and 38 one-nils would do just fine, thank you very much.

He’s a jealous cockwomble. Fair to moan if Saka misses, but he doesn’t.

Plenty of time for a 2nd half pen to open his account.

Corner FC with another goal from a Rice delivery. The Gyok still looks a bit lost.

Neville whinging that sak didn't square it to Gyok for his first goal

Zubimendi gradually growing into things.

Neville whinging that sak didn't square it to Gyok for his first goal

Neville whinging that sak didn't square it to Gyok for his first goal

Neville whinging that sak didn't square it to Gyok for his first goal

Timber with the assist. Very sharp today.

Is this now the era of boring arsenal that wins things?

Is this now the era of boring arsenal that wins things?

To be fair we are too! DIfference is in 2025, Arsenal off form are still pretty fucking good.

Had the same thought just now. Just be so hard to simulate in training what these league games are actually like

Zubimendi gradually growing into things.

Sakaaaaa

Hah commentators just moaning how shit we are and starboi does that!!!

Timberrrrr

Timber with the assist. Very sharp today.

Decland Rice is the best centre mid in world football

Not used to playing in the rarefied air in the Prem

We haven't had an open play shot on target this half?

Struggling to get some air by the looks of it.

Gyokeres struggling to get into the game.

Apparently

Jarred shoulder?

Zibimendi been watching the way Partey shoots

Jarred shoulder?

Saka looks even sleepier than Odegaard really.

Poor from Calafiori. Pretty poor so far from all. No question.

Rwaneri

Bring on Eze.

Who will gently chip the ball to the CB at the far post if Odegaard comes off?

Ode coming off

How is Madueke doing?

I'll try to get to a screen to catch the second half.

Also drew a yellow, which we have yet to exploit.

Think press-resistance is something we've needed to improve for at least a year or two. Looking to Zubimendi to help with this. Midfield not especially involved in helping progress moves collectively.

What is this shit, slow and pathetic football??

How is Madueke doing?

I'll try to get to a screen to catch the second half.

Not seen much of the ball yet. Had an average shot/cross

Not seen much of the ball yet. Had an average shot/cross

How is Madueke doing?

I'll try to get to a screen to catch the second half.

He doesn’t need to. Just stay in the 10 position

Is your coat handy

Ødegaard has progressed everything through midfield so far.

Zubi is still ill perhaps?

Hope he's on the mendi soon.

Zubi is still ill perhaps?

Hope he's on the mendi soon.

Zubi looks physically miles off.

What a save.

Zubi looks physically miles off.

Gyökeres had more time there. Rushed

Does Ødegaard need to be that deep.

Not the best shot from Gyök that

Just passed a betting shop showing it. Result!!!

Just passed a betting shop showing it. Result!!!

Bogle four letter word Cunt

Scouse Cunts fan... And who do we play next week??

It’s Gary fucking Neville again.

Good lord my stream is that far behind ready?! Ha ha shit

Peep! COYG!!! Dirty Leeds

Nah, I wanted Madueke to try there. Something different, especially as that position’s gonna be locked very soon!! Resorting to watching a stream in the car on the way back to Benevento. Been quite a ...

One of my least favourite officials, Jarred Gillett, officiating. At least he's not on VAR duty seeing imaginary fouls. He's "just" in the middle 🫣

Big game for Madueke, because of the options available on the left. I would have preferred Trossard if he was fully fit, but hopefully Madueke can put in a good performance.

Big game for Madueke, because of the options available on the left. I would have preferred Trossard if he was fully fit, but hopefully Madueke can put in a good performance.

Eze 10

❤️

FFS I was taping it

Eze being announced on pitch at 5.20

FFS I was taping it

Eze being announced on pitch at 5.20

I do believe that's past tense, very past.

He flipped on that pretty quick and now I think he'd laugh at himself for even suggesting it

Eze being announced on pitch at 5.20

Aye but if you run out whole squad, you can’t fit in those lads I mentioned if there’s a spot in the 25-man PL squad for Dowman

Nine on the bench.

Find an Irish bar? Multiple screens may be the answer

Does that mean one of Viera/Lokonga/Reiss Nelson didn’t make our 25-man squad?

Strong first team. Strong bench. Just been to the Maradona mural, the whole square a shrine to the man, can’t even describe fully the emotions. Awestruck! Now in Spaccanapoli, the old quarter, very lo...

Dowman on the bench.

Blimey... Disgustingly Sweet Energy Drink Leipzig cunts got humped 6-0 by Bayern last night... Hawwy Kunt grabbed a hat-trick, a brace from Olise and a debut Luis Diaz goal.

Not all that long, actually. Between a week or two? I think...

Can't believe Pires reckons he's better than Saka.

A box set of their two games

I see Scott Parker has ditched the cardigan in favour of a suit.

Before Ange, they had a period of reasonable defensive solidity and low-block acumen... and two forwards frighteningly good at dropping deep and aiding transitions. Kane, in particular, was annoyingly...

Arse!
Well in nivekster! Be lucky!

Just seen the early scoreline... 🤨 Why does Pep have such an hilarious difficulty with that lot?

Tottenham will get bitch slapped back into their grim prism of ignominy soon (one hopes).

Tottenham will get bitch slapped back into their grim prism of ignominy soon (one hopes).

The DVD of this match will be available by 5pm.

It's May that counts, MG.

I bet he used to stand at the edge of the bed whilst wearing a cardigan and flapping his arms around, complaining that she wouldn't let him leave the technical area

Ugh.. don't look at the PL table now, lads..

I bet he used to stand at the edge of the bed whilst wearing a cardigan and flapping his arms around, complaining that she wouldn't let him leave the technical area

Wow this season gonna be innaresting

Haaland has been nigh on invisible this half

Haha

I hope she cleaned him out good and proper. Imagine having to live with that bald intense weirdo

No wonder the wife fucked off you baldy cunt

No wonder the wife fucked off you baldy cunt

No wonder the wife fucked off you baldy cunt

Sorry to hear about your friend mg.,

Yep agreed. I think Arteta is doing an objectively good job, we're challenging on all fronts BUT winning is everything.

City look woeful. Spurs always beat them anyway but even taking that into accou...

Hey Nik... How long does it take for an order from your *cough* mate's *cough* store to arrive on average?

A friend of mine who i shared a house with in college went the same way last year. Only 55, shocking.

I beg your pardon?

Judge Reijnders less impressive up against some decent players.

Judge Reijnders less impressive up against some decent players.

I’m sure minge flannels have their use

Can't believe Pires reckons he's better than Saka.

Doku is an utterly useless minge flannel

Doku is an utterly useless minge flannel

You know it's bad when you're bringing on Doku and 2025 Bernardo Silva to change the game.

Two early thoughts on Manchester City.

Old Trafford is no longer the worst of the Traffords

There is still a clueless bald cunt managing in Manchester.

A lot of upheaval in that City squad.

We have to win something this season... and this isn't a shot at Arteta. It just really has to be now.

Richie Pigeoncunt is starting to lose his head. Would be hilarious if he got a red card

Nico Gonzalez wouldn't make our first team squad. Be our 6th choice centre mid or something.

Apologies. Bad taste

Condolences

Richie Pigeoncunt is starting to lose his head. Would be hilarious if he got a red card

Nico Gonzalez wouldn't make our first team squad. Be our 6th choice centre mid or something.

That might have been the cause

He was a Manure fan and I'm glad I didn't rub it in his face last week.

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

He's off to Turkiye, I believe.

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

Thanks man

Sorry to hear that MG

Fuck!

Just got a text saying my friend passed away from a heart attack.

Damn.. life is fleeting..

FFS.... They really are C115eh's bogey team!

They're 2-0 up..

BFA's Sp*rs would be 3-0 down by now.

He's off to Turkiye, I believe.

Does Ederson not start for man city anymore

Is the US Naval base still there?

That goes without saying!

We’re heading to the Stadio Diego Armando Maradona, haven’t been since I was a kid. Then an area devoted to murals of the man, then some sightseeing then eventually to a pub...

Ooooh I was in the North Bank for that!

Alan Ball, Brian Greenhoff (og) and Paddy Roche (og). Alan Ball was trying to give Geordie Armstrong the third one as he took the corner, but Roche flapped it in 😂 Arsenal should have had six at lea...

Love that show. Who scored?

Heh

"Come on Vik, it’s now or never! "

Or at least now or next week

I just watched highlights of an Arsenal v Man Utd game from 1975 on The Big Match Revisited. 2-1 up deep into the second half, still attacking whenever possible, no thought of "game management" and re...

My overriding memory of Naples is the psychopathic driving and even more psychopathic jaywalking. They live life on the edge down there.

Beautiful bay.

Well that clears that up. Was a bit surprised at the time

Norgaard has an injury.

Off to Napoli for the day, to see the city and find a good place to watch the match. Hoping the spirit of Diego is with us 🩵

COYG ❤️🤍❤️

Off to Napoli for the day, to see the city and find a good place to watch the match. Hoping the spirit of Diego is with us 🩵

COYG ❤️🤍❤️

Off to Napoli for the day, to see the city and find a good place to watch the match. Hoping the spirit of Diego is with us 🩵

COYG ❤️🤍❤️

They looked quite open at the back against Everton on Monday night

I was a strong advocate for Sesko and was dismayed at the pivot to Gyokeres, but the decision was made so we'll have to support Vic during his accilimisation period.

I'm sure there is an understandi...

Not sure, and he left Noorgard off the bench

“He’s not a great player”. Quite a few were saying this before as well as the concerns about the relative ease of the Portuguese league. Haaland does very little off the ball but his strength and bull...